Too Many Leftists See the Poor as Rescue Pets That Need Neutering
One of the best ways to think clearly is via analogy. No doubt the following argument will provoke this instant dismissal: “That’s not the same thing!”
To that, the proper answer is always (and say this slowly, like Al Gore speaking to small children): “No, it isn’t. That’s why it’s called an an-al-og-y. If they were the same it would be an e-qua-tion.”
We Can’t Control Our Borders, So We’ll Manage World Fertility Rates
Okay, so here’s an analogy that will help make sense of the incoherent views held by your average leftist on immigration and population. A leftist like, say, President Immanuel Macron of France. He won’t stop mass immigration into France, but he does want to reduce the number of kids whom African women have. And for all his technocratic education, he can’t see what’s wrong with his plan. (Neither can American environmentalists, who favor open borders but panic over U.S. population.)
So here’s how to explain it.
Good Fences, or Free Vasectomies?
Immanuel — can I call you “Manny”?
Imagine you had some low-rent, rough-around-the-edges neighbors. They play their trashy music too loud at all hours of the night. They roast whole pigs over gasoline fires. And they smack their children in public. Boy, do they have a lot of them. You’ve lost count, actually.
Those rugrats are unruly. They keep coming on to your property and damaging your stuff. They pee in your pool. They’ve spray-painted their names on the side of your house. They’ve left the gate open and one of your dogs ran away.
So what do you do? If you were a conservative, you’d call the cops when those neighbors broke the law. But you’d know better than to rely on that. You’d start to secure your property. You’d put up a nice, high fence. Maybe get a German Shepherd with a loud, intimidating bark.
If you’re a leftist in this analogy, you won’t do that. You feel that restricting the movement of those poor kids somehow violates their rights. So you leave your yard unfenced. You designate Saturday as graffiti cleaning day. You microchip your dogs and hope for the best.
Leftists feel squeamish about borders. Ashamed of nationhood.
But you’re not giving up. Instead, you set out to really solve the problem at its root: You need to make sure your neighbors stop having so many children in the first place. They clearly don’t know how to bring them up properly. Those brats won’t have fruitful lives. You can tell just by looking at them. The guy’s wife is clearly overwhelmed. Hasn’t she heard of feminism?
Welcome to the Neighborhood. Now Stop Breeding.
So you start heading over to your neighbor’s house with gifts — and birth control pamphlets. You bring over your two carefully-spaced and perfectly coiffed bilingual kids. They show off their science fair projects. Your hope is that those parents will see the contrast with their large and ill-behaved brood and get the idea.
You need to make sure your neighbors stop having so many children in the first place. They clearly don’t how to bring them up properly. Those brats won’t have fruitful lives. You can tell just by looking at them.
If that doesn’t work, maybe you take the dad out for beers and pull out the big guns. You know that he wants a bass boat. He clearly can’t afford it. But looky here: It’s a picture of a nice, new shiny bass boat. You’ll be more than happy to buy it for him — provided he gets a vasectomy. You’ll need to see the lab report, of course.
Let’s say he does the right thing and punches you in the face. Do you give up? Oh no.
That’s when you work on the wife. Every day, you send your own wife over — wearing those rather chic clothes which you can afford and your neighbors can’t. She brings a bottle of wine, or maybe a six-pack. Maybe some cute little item from Target in just the right size. Relax, it’s a gift! All she has to do is take one of those birth control pills which your wife has thoughtfully brought in a little paper cup. We just need to see that you’ve swallowed it and voila! Those acid-washed jean shorts are yours.
710 Million Migrants
I’ve just laid the strategy which American environmentalists, French socialists, and globalist technocrats at the E.U. and U.N. are taking toward the Third World. They do admit one basic truth: That the developed world can’t simply open its borders. We can’t let everyone in the world go wherever he wants, then go on welfare. They’ve read reports like this one: According to the Gallup Poll, “Nearly 710 million adults worldwide want to migrate to another country and 147 million of those specifically want to come to the United States.” No, they don’t want to let that happen. (A few cranks like Bill McKibben want Westerners to have zero children to make room for immigrants.)
But they feel squeamish about borders. Ashamed of nationhood. They can’t man up and admit that they want to protect their own living standards. Instead, they have to be sneaky. To convince themselves and others that what they are doing is altruistic. They’re not trying to save their nice bourgeois countries. No, they just recognize the blight of overpopulation. Its impact on
- Global warming
- Resource Depletion, or
- Some other high-minded sounding pretext, like bringing back the dinosaurs or something. It doesn’t really matter.
So to help the poor denizens of those sad, benighted countries, they’ll selflessly help to cull their numbers by pressuring them not to have children. See what noble and altruistic progressives they really are?
Of course this is toxic nonsense. It violates no one’s rights to say that he can’t move into your country and become a dependent. It treats him as an adult, with full human dignity. He’s just an adult who can’t move into your basement and use your swimming pool.
Your average leftist doesn’t really believe in human dignity, even his own. But he does want to keep his stuff intact, and his country reasonably comfortable. So he will treat people in poor countries like cute but hapless pets in a rescue shelter. All they need is a warm meal, a flea bath, and (of course) spaying and neutering. No charge! The snips are on us.