Scientists, Women, the Press Think Trump is Coming for Them

He's everywhere! He's everywhere!

By William M Briggs Published on January 25, 2017

A week or so before the election, there was a rumor bumping around the Internet which said Trump, if he were to become President, would immediately begin rounding up LGBT folk and placing them into camps. I replied to one of these exceptionally nervous people on Twitter, “It won’t be so bad. I hear Thursdays will be lasagna nights.” That earned me a blocking. (I have since deleted my account.)

Over this past weekend, a mob of angry females tromped through the streets of Washington DC. Boy, were they upset. Fuming. Nary a happy face. Trouble was, no one was able to discover why these citizens were displeased. Perhaps the nation is suffering a critical shortage of blue hair dye? Can somebody look that up?

One woman not reduced to incoherent ravings about her cat (that’s what I thought I heard), said Donald Trump was going to come after women and break them up like “puzzle pieces.” Jack the Ripper, look out! It’s Donald Trump, puzzle breaker.

The eminent New York Times writer Ross Douthat isn’t shivering over internment camps or feminist puzzle breaking, but he did wring his hands over the possibility that Donald Trump “will escalate from tweets to Erdoganian crackdowns, that truly independent journalism will be marginalized while the White House breeds a lap dog press.”

It doesn’t do to criticize Times writers, of course, but is it even theoretically possible for the press to more resemble a fluffy white pampered poodle, blind with devotion, madly licking its master, and barring its wee yellow teeth and yipping at intruders than it did during Mr Obama’s tenure?

Fear of an all-powerful Trumpenführer has not been confined to dyspeptics, dye-jobs, and diarists. The officially brightest among us — scientists themselves! — have convinced themselves Trump is going to confiscate their data. Headline at Forbes: “Fearing White House Purge Of Climate Science, Scientists Frantically Copying Data.” The author, James Conca, said:

It’s not like the new administration is going to start burning books or flushing files down the toilet, but website access will disappear, reports will be put in deep storage, and datasets will become more difficult to access, or will degrade in quality, as funding is cut from the agencies maintaining them.

Conca says this data is needed because the United States has been under attack from the Polar Vortex, a beast which he intimates was caused by global warming (which he mistakenly refer to as “climate change”).

Conca is calling these deletions, which have not happened, a “purging of science” which will result in the nation “sliding further into the abyss where truth and lies have equal weight and science is just another ideology to ignore when it’s inconvenient.”

Engadget asks whether the data panic is “irrational.” “Possibly”, they admit, but then they claim the new administration “has been picking climate change deniers for positions in relevant agencies, and has threatened to stop ‘politicized science.'” (Incidentally, no Trump hire has ever denied the climate has changed.)

How Trump will reach into the computers of all those scientists and vacuum up their precious bits hasn’t been specified. Maybe he will hire the Russians who hacked and stole the election from its rightful winner to do the job? Scientists will come in to their offices after a weekend to discover their hard drives have been purged of the proof the sky will soon fall and replaced with JPEGs of Rosie O’Donnell laughing.

Scary stuff! No wonder Harvard is sponsoring an “Archive-a-thon” to begin the backups before Trump comes after them. The announcement doesn’t say, but it’s a good guess the Archive-a-thon will take place in a Safe Space complete with puppies and coloring books to calm the nerves of these great brains. Don’t scoff. It’s got to the point where there is serious talk of scientists having a march on Washington.

Since there is so much angst out there, it is well to review its cause. Progressives assured us, in turn, that Ronald Reagan was Hitler, that George Bush père et fils were Hitler, that Barack Obama opponents John McCain and Mitt Romney were each Hitler, really that every Republican since Goldwater was Hitler, and so none of us would have been surprised to learn that Donald Trump was Hitler, too.

But it was worse! The Left insisted Trump was literally Hitler. Which brings to mind Mr Trump’s inauguration speech in which he spoke of “an education system flush with cash, but which leaves our young and beautiful students deprived of all knowledge” — including, as we have just seen, knowledge of the word literally.

After decades of creating and telling themselves horror stories, it was inevitable that the Left would begin believing them.

After decades of creating and telling themselves horror stories, it was inevitable that the Left would begin believing them. It is thus not surprising that Trump’s election resulted in a full-blown moral panic. We’re in for four (or eight?) years of having everything that goes wrong blamed on Donald Trump. Might as well enjoy it.

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  • Howard Rosenbaum

    I need to type fast, very fast. I’m certain my brain is being probed by aliens. Trump’s election has signaled an invitation to every foreign entity not just on earth but beyond.
    They, in cahoots w/this new demagogue will create havoc, the likes of which have never
    been seen heretofore. I know this is so. All of Hollywood & even the mainstream media know this. They are just keeping a low profile to prevent national panic. They should be
    congratulated for their self constraint. The deal w/this election is simple. The Russians were only a distraction from the real story. Those who accuse this president of being Hitler are almost correct. Hitler fathered a child w/the evil Ms Braun. She birthed this baby Hitler in
    June 1946. Mom & dad Hitler were busy securing a hitlerian future in those bunkers.Don’t be fooled by the historians. They were rescued by jewish patriots of the third reich.
    We must be vigilant. Trump is relocating the embassy to Jerusalem for a reason.
    Don’t be fooled. Theres so little time. The aliens – the aliens – the aliens – THEY’RE EVERYWHERE …!!!!!!
    WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW …?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Dean Bruckner

      You are missing your tag methinks.

      • Howard Rosenbaum

        The aliens – the aliens – the aliens ….

  • Gary

    Only liberals think Trump is after them. And I LOVE IT!!!!! Watching liberals suffer is SO much fun.

  • Dean Bruckner

    Just as liberals view children as a threat (e.g., their vitriol against Barron Trump, calling him a future rapist and mass-murderer), they view the responsible officials in legitimate government–the exercise of adult common sense and, in many cases, masculine courage–as genocidal maniacs with blood dripping from their fangs.

    It’s all psychological projection. Mass murder, rape, totalitarian mass genocide and slave labor camps–that’s what the Left does whenever it gets a chance. That’s what they would have lined up to do if Hillary had won. Their thinking is so polluted and their morality is so shrunken that such measures is what they expect from the “other,” in this case the Democrats.

    We must crush Progressivism into dust, using every legal, moral and prudent measure.

  • Autrey Windle

    My first thought when I saw Madonna spewing vile hatred out to a crowd who looked just like her wearing little hats with pointy things on top was, ‘Are those little pointy things horn warmers?’. Now I find out those pointy things were a reference to female private parts. Hold on! Now I know why the sex revolution prevailed… women are so undereducated that they have been running around with no underwear and putting stupid hats on their heads because they don’t know where the personal anatomy is… Eureka! Please President Trump, forget global warming ignorance and cleanse the science sites that fail to report this and send these rude ignorant girls back to school..and please HURRY!

    • Yawrate

      The little hats remind me of Dilbert’s pointy haired boss.

      • Autrey Windle

        That’s funny! I still think they may have been trying to conceal their goat horns and keep them warm so they wouldn’t know up front that they might be heading for hell. Madonna would be the perfect tour guide… I’m pretty sure I saw her when I was there once but she wouldn’t follow me or be led to the exit by anyone…

  • Christian Cowboy

    Kool Aid and Rainbow Stew has done significant damage to some peoples ability to think and make decisions for themselves. So many of the people who are so afraid of the future are just followers that do not think!

  • Liz Litts

    The way these people keep invoking “HItler’ –you just know they don’t know diddly about history or have ever met anyone who lived through that horror.

    • Apparently they haven’t heard of Godwins’ Law either, or its following corollary:

      “For example, there is a tradition in many newsgroups and other Internet discussion forums that once such a comparison is made, the thread is finished and whoever mentioned Hitler has automatically lost whatever debate was in progress.”

  • Lisa Koester Xayavong

    Too funny!

  • Yawrate

    I find the whole panic over Trump amusing. The hyperbole and the sputtering incoherence of the women’s march is still entertaining me! I even live with a young snowflake who just this morning is returning to her more normal self. Which is to say she’ll go back to ignoring politics. After all the new administration will likely do nothing that directly affects her and politics makes her head hurt.

  • Nels

    Is there anything in this article which couldn’t be summed up by saying “Liberals always lie?”

  • America’s three biggest whiners — climate change “scientists,” liberal feminists and the mainstream media.

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