Congratulations, Kyle Rittenhouse! Now Flee to Brazil While You Can

By John Zmirak Published on November 19, 2021

I was one of the very first commentators to assert Kyle Rittenhouse’s innocence. I’m proud that everything I wrote stood the test of time. More importantly, of course, a jury of Rittenhouse’s peers, and an honest judge, viewed the evidence honestly.

It likely didn’t help that the prosecution had doctored video footage it provided to the defense. Or that one obese, bumbling prosecutor told the jury Kyle should have “taken a beating” from a mob. Or that the story media had trumpeted to the skies was all contradicted by the facts.

No, Rittenhouse wasn’t a “white nationalist.”

No, he hadn’t illegally transported a gun across state lines.

No, he hadn’t chased the Antifa thugs he ended up shooting. They had chased and threatened him.

No, no, no, none of the willful lies reported by our newspapers and TV networks panned out in the slightest.  

Anglo-Saxon Liberties Matter

That didn’t matter to the media, but it mattered in the courtroom. We do still have a few of our old Anglo-Saxon liberties, including trial by jury. (Does that ethnic reference offend anyone? If so, I’m glad. Choke on it, bigot.) We also have a constitutional provision forbidding double jeopardy. You can’t be tried for capital offenses over and over again.

In a healthy country, Kyle Rittenhouse and his family could celebrate. He could start applying to colleges and suing media outlets for defamation. Of course, he should never have been charged in the first place. Any decent prosecutor who looked at the relevant videos should have tossed the case back in the face of whatever fool had submitted it, and walked over to shake a fine young man’s hand. But we live in a country eaten up with cancer, rotted half away from gangrene, driven halfway mad by syphilis.

Jake Gardner’s Body Lies a’ Mouldering in the Grave

We live in the country where Jake Gardner’s even more clear-cut case of self-defense didn’t end in a fair trial. When the first prosecutor who rightly tossed out any charges was mobbed for six long weeks by political thugs, he handed the case to a Soros-linked prosecutor. That political hack cobbled together charges designed to lock up that infantry veteran and decorated hero for more than 100 years. GoFundMe canceled Gardner’s attempt to raise money for his defense. The landlord for Gardner’s business tossed him out on the street. Convinced he’d be railroaded into prison and burdened by PTSD, Jake Gardner finally killed himself.

That’s what our neighbors in blue states and our masters in the Bidenist Occupational Government have in mind for Kyle Rittenhouse, too. They’re not going to let something as quaint as a jury trial stand in their way. These people burned entire cities, formed terrorist-run separatist enclaves, burned courthouses and cop cars. They will never stop. Never.

Possessed by Demons

Like the citizens of the town in Dostoevsky’s The Possessed, we see leftists baying and screaming, undergoing convulsions in the streets. Look at the video here. You’ll be tempted at first to laugh, as we did at the tantrums after Donald Trump’s election.

But don’t. Remember how that preternatural rage turned into four long years of vicious persecution, fueled by lies and hatred, culminating in massive fraud. Remember what was done to General Mike Flynn, Carter Page, Mark Judge, and other innocents who got in their way. Remember how willing our media were to lie about Hunter Biden’s laptop, while our FBI played along.

Today, as Joe Biden’s brain was even more quiescent than usual, proctologists probed for tumors. Be sure that DoJ lawyers were present too, poking around for federal charges they could pull out of Biden’s orifice and throw at Kyle Rittenhouse. At least one member of Congress, the enormous atrocity that is Rep. Jerry Nadler, is already calling on the Justice Department to charge Rittenhouse:

It Will Be GITMO on the Potomac for Kyle

I think we can see from the fate of Jacob Chansley and the other January 6 defendants how a Rittenhouse case would proceed. He would be denied bail, dumped in a DC jail in solitary confinement, and would face a more hostile jury pool. Instead of Wisconsin amateurs, he’d be legally hunted through the courts by the fiercest attack dogs in the legal profession, who’d compete for the “honor” of doing so.

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Right now, Kyle Rittenhouse is a free man. He should fly to Brazil and ask the Bolsonaro government for political asylum. Our extradition treaty with that country doesn’t cover “political crimes” or the nonsensical “denial of civil rights” charges that Biden’s team would bring. He should file his defamation lawsuits against all our major media from a comfortable apartment in beautiful Rio de Janeiro, which has lots of wonderful Art Deco buildings from the 40s.

Sorry Kyle, there’s no place in America for men like you. Not anymore. If we ever get that exorcism, we’ll make sure to invite you back.


John Zmirak is a senior editor at The Stream and author or co-author of ten books, including The Politically Incorrect Guide to Immigration and The Politically Incorrect Guide to Catholicism. He is co-author with Jason Jones of “God, Guns, & the Government.”

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