There’s a Conspiracy to Make Me a Theorist

And it's working like a charm.

By John Zmirak Published on September 24, 2020

Callous, power-hungry elitists meet in secret, lavish places like Davos, Switzerland … the eaves of Bohemian Grove … the Skull and Bones “tomb” in New Haven. Misanthropic billionaires trade nods and winks, and vast funds get transferred from numbered accounts in Zurich to offshore accounts in the Caymans.

That money, via numerous untraceable cut-outs, ends up as stacks of $20 bills in Ziploc bags that Democratic National Committee operatives FedEx to central locations in major cities. It will pay for the hotel rooms of pedophiles, ex-pimps and drug dealers, who will manage the insurrection. These wolves will lead all the sheep they can herd, drawn by the prospect of free stuff looted from stores, to burn down American cities.

Carefully Coordinated Media Coverage

Meanwhile, detailed scripts and talking points from Soros-funded advocate groups get texted simultaneously to news editors nationwide, at TV networks and newspapers, websites and social media platforms. No matter what happens that night, this is what they will report.

If someone goes off script he will find himself canceled — either fired outright, or accused of workplace harassment, and hounded out of the business. If renegade news sources contradict the party line? They will find themselves blocked and silenced, linked with racist extremists, or otherwise discredited.

The goal, the telos, the purpose of all this clandestine activity? To turn me, John Zmirak, into an unhinged conspiracy theorist.

The Real Target of the Kyle Rittenhouse Persecution … Me

I can’t think of any more reasonable explanation of the Kyle Rittenhouse incident. Surely, leftist elites didn’t intend to actually fool large numbers of people with such a transparent, outrageous frame-up? If the goal were to convince Americans that any use of force in resisting leftist rioters was evil, they’d have been a lot more careful.

They’d have made sure that the leaders of the mob attacking Rittenhouse weren’t convicted pedophiles or gun criminals. That the gunowner trying to stop arsonists from torching local businesses wasn’t a model citizen, a volunteer EMT, with no links to extremism. Certainly not a baby-faced 17-year-old who’d been giving out first aid to rioters just hours before.

Way Too Sloppy

They wouldn’t have let one of the failed killer’s friends report that his pal in the hospital wished he’d emptied his gun into Kyle. They would have made all the witnesses wipe their camera-phone footage of the mob chasing Kyle first. Of rioters firing shots, and three of them mobbing Kyle as he lay prone on the ground. And one rioter hitting him in the head with a skateboard, then the other running up with a handgun. That way, nobody would ever see a report like the one Tucker Carlson gave on Fox:



Like a Whipped Dog, Show Your Belly for Biden! 

If the secret purpose was just trying to scare us into voting for Joe Biden as a submission gesture — the way a beaten dog shows its belly? The plotters would have made sure that Rittenhouse was the one who ended up dead. Instead of two leftist thugs dying, and another going to the hospital, while Rittenhouse walked off unscathed — and tried to surrender to cops.

Joe Biden’s America: a senile mishmash of pious phrases, cold hungry ambition, and fading memories cribbed from other men’s autobiographies.

Obviously, no prosecutor seriously expects first degree murder charges — the kind Lee Harvey Oswald would have faced — to stick against Rittenhouse. Just filing them sounds like a joke, or a stunt to gaslight … John Zmirak. To drive me over the brink.

Likewise, the fact that GoFundMe shut down the appeal to raise money for Rittenhouse’s defense. And that Facebook and Twitter tried to silence his supporters, even suspending his lawyer, Lin Wood — the same guy who hammered CNN and the Washington Post on behalf of Nicholas Sandmann.

Joe Biden’s Senile Mishmash

It’s all so shoddy, amateurish, and doomed to fail. We are not Joe Biden’s America, a senile mishmash of pious phrases, cold hungry ambition, and fading memories cribbed from other men’s autobiographies. At least, not yet.

And farces like the persecution of Kyle Rittenhouse seem almost designed to make sure we never will be. What sane people would vote to put such malevolent bumblers in charge of a country — especially one with plenty of hair-trigger nuclear weapons?

No, it’s all aimed at me. It’s an effort to render me paranoid. To convince me that I’m the target of a global conspiracy. And I have to say to my enemies, “Well played! It’s working like a charm.”

The Hunting of Jake Gardner

Jake Gardner, RIP. (Photo via Linked In)

No, if leftist elites were really using all their persuasive and coercive power, their skills and their cash, to terrorize Americans into turning our cities over to rioting thugs and the White House to a party ruled by extremists, they’d do something quite different. Something more chilling, ruthless, and viciously effective.

They’d send in rioters to attack a U.S. Marine veteran defending his own business after it was vandalized. He’d see his elderly father knocked to the ground. Then a drug-addled ex-con rioter would jump on his back, putting him in a potentially deadly chokehold. He’d shoot the rioter in self-defense. Local prosecutors would even conclude that it was a clean, legal shooting.

Legislators Celebrating a Veteran’s Suicide

Then violent protests and political pressure would get a special prosecutor appointed to hunt the man who’d defended himself. And charge him suddenly with multiple felonies. Media would stoke a lynch mob atmosphere against this citizen. Fake accusations of racism, death threats, and prospect of life in a prison would haunt the poor man. Timid conservatives would leave him undefended, hated, alone. Finally, haunted by a country he’d served that had turned against him, and a world turned upside down, he’d take his own life. And a public official, a state senator, would celebrate his death as a piece of progress against “racism.” 

All of the above happened to business owner and U.S. Marine veteran Jake Gardner in Omaha, Nebraska.

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Will You Flip Over on Your Back?

I wasn’t the target there, gentle readers. That campaign of terror was aimed at you.

In November, will you roll over and show your belly? The all too real conspirators funding these riots — filling hotel suites with anarchists, rental trucks with weapons, and media stories with slander — bet that you will.


John Zmirak is a senior editor at The Stream, and author or co-author of ten books, including The Politically Incorrect Guide to Immigration and The Politically Incorrect Guide to Catholicism. He is co-author with Jason Jones of “God, Guns, & the Government.”


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