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Still More ‘Scripture’ from Eric Metaxas’ #TrumpBible

By The Editors Published on September 11, 2015

Earlier today, The Stream linked to a hilarious piece our friend Eric Metaxas wrote for The New Yorker on what ‘scriptures’ one may find in a bible conceived by Donald Trump.

Since publishing his now-viral #TrumpBible collection, Eric has “uncovered” even more imaginary nuggets to brighten our way into the weekend:

“Master, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” And Jesus replied, “Again with the gotcha questions?” #TrumpBible

 

Then Jesus took a little cracker & gave it to his disciples, saying “Try it. You’ll feel HUGELY cleansed.” #TrumpBible

 

And then he took the little wine & said “Drink from it, all of you. But go easy! It’s not grape juice!” #TrumpBible

 

“Master, can a lapsed Presbyterian enter the Kingdom? And there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. #TrumpBible

 

They asked: “Was John’s baptism from heaven or of human origin?” And he replied: “Um. Probably equal.” #TrumpBible

 

You wanna follow God, terrific. You wanna follow Baal, go ahead. I’m really beyond caring at this point. #TrumpBible

 

It’s a land flowing w/milk & honey, but it’s milk & honey they stole from us bc our leaders are stupid. #TrumpBible

 

Render unto Caesars the things that are Caesars, but the MGM Grand is another story. Horrendous people. #TrumpBible

Eric’s not done yet. Here are his two most recent offerings:

For all the fun, Eric Metaxas has also had some serious business to tend to this week. On Tuesday, the Bonhoeffer author released his latest book, 7 Women: And the Secrets of Their GreatnessThe eagerly-anticipated sequel to his best seller 7 Men offers compelling portraits of seven women who changed the world by following God’s call upon their lives — as women. 

You can read an excerpt here from Eric’s chapter on Mother Teresa.

In addition, The Stream’s own John Zmirak has offered a review of the book in his latest column, “Seven Women: Saints Who Won’t Make You Gag.”