UPDATE: Christine Blasey Ford is now refusing to testify until there has been an FBI investigation. Even if GOP goes along, how long would that take? Ford says she’s already recounted all she remembers, supposed witness Mark Judge doesn’t recall anything remotely like what she alleges happening and Brett Kavanaugh is vehemently denying the allegation. Plus she doesn’t know where or when it took place or who else was there. The investigation could be wrapped up by lunch.

When writing about the Brett Kavanaugh situation yesterday, I intended to do a follow-up from a more personal angle. I’ve got two grandnephews in high school and a grandniece who is about the same age as Christine Blasey Ford was at the time of the alleged attack.

So this saga is, to borrow a stale expression, a “teachable moment.” Time for some sage advice from old Uncle Albert. But ultimately all the words I had came down to something simple: “Avoid booze and bedrooms.”

I’ll add one more quick word of wisdom to Nolan and Garrett: It’s still better to be “one of the good guys,” even if 35 years later someone tries to destroy your life anyway. 

Growing More Cynical About the Story by the Hour

Yes, I’m growing more convinced with each passing moment that this is rotten to the core. Let’s run through a few items:

There’s still no confirmation Ford will bother testifying at Monday’s hearing. Chuck Grassley says efforts at contact have failed. What’s that about? “Sorry. I can’t take your call or defend my allegation because, dang it, I have the Fall Syllabus to hand out.” It does not work that way, professor. If you had time to scrub your social media, hire a lawyer, get a polygraph, you have time to talk to Grassley. 

And speaking of the polygraph, the WaPo notes the results “concluded that Ford was being truthful when she said a statement summarizing her allegations was accurate.” Odd wording, as many, including the Daily Caller News Foundation pointed out. It’s not saying the story itself is truthful. Only the statement summation was accurate.

We Don’t Need No Stinking Proof!

Ford’s lawyer Debra Katz is  saying it’s not up to Ford to corroborate her story. So we can all just go around accusing people of heinous crimes and walk away? 

Katz herself turns out to be top honcho at a Soros-funded effort to defeat Kavanaugh. The same George Soros who paid people to protest the Kavanaugh hearings. How far is that cash spreading? How far are they willing to go?

Katz is also elevating Ford’s allegations from what was in her letter or her Post interview. She’s now on national television calling it “attempted rape.”

The political posturing by Democrats is nauseating. Tell Keith Ellison’s ex-girlfriend Karen Monahan you really care about the abuse of women. The liberal activist said yesterday that her own Democratic Party doesn’t believe her abuse allegations against the Democratic congressman and #2 at the DNC. Monahan says that Dems have “smeared, threatened, isolated” her.

But for a conservative judge they’ve spent months examining with a fine-tooth comb, bring on the FBI! Now! Then hang him by his judicial robes.

Two things we can take to the bank:

1. None of this would be happening to Kavanaugh if he were a liberal judge.
2. You don’t need a Dream Team to get you off on serious allegations. Just a “D” by your name. 

Then there’s Senator Dianne Feinstein.

The Once Honorable Sen. Feinstein

I used to respect Sen. Feinstein when I lived in California. In fact, I voted for her in my Democrat days. Compared to the nutty, incompetent and mean-spirited Sen. Barbara Boxer, she was practically Margaret Thatcher. But that was long ago. Today’s she’s running for re-election, running on fumes and running with the weight of radical Californians on her back. 

Feinstein had this allegation for two months. Why’d she sit on it? Hoping it would hatch into a nest full of other allegations? She had Kavanaugh face-to-face behind closed doors and in open hearing. Not a peep about this. Was she being tactical? Cowardly? Or did the Old Honorable Gentlewoman from California realize garbage when she saw it and didn’t want to wreck a clearly decent man with it?

The latter may be the case. Fox News is quoting Feinstein as saying Ford “is a woman that has been, I think, profoundly impacted on this … I can’t say that everything is truthful. I don’t know.”  

A Quickie Hit Job?

Whatever the case, Feinstein is now upset that Republicans won’t take the time for a full investigation. She had Ford’s letter in her pocket and the FBI running around the country doing a background check for two months. FBI closed their books. Hearings came and went. Now she and the Democrats want an investigation into this? I call foul.

Feinstein is also complaining that Republicans are only calling two witnesses to next Monday’s hearing: Kavanaugh and his accuser. However, Feinstein doesn’t see the disaster looming for her if she does. 

First, the one person Ford names as a witness, Mark Judge, says it didn’t happen. And Kavanaugh wasn’t into doing anything crazy and illegal. Sure, Feinstein can say Judge was lying or too drunk to remember … assuming she can be heard over Cory Booker yelling “I am Spartacus!”  But ultimately, you have a guy who admits to having had blackouts against someone who can’t even remember for sure the year the incident took place. 

But that’s not the real danger for Feinstein and the Democratic effort to destroy Kavanaugh if the witness list is expanded. The very last thing Feinstein wants is those five dozen women who knew Kavanaugh in high school to tell the world under oath that Kavanaugh was Lloyd Dobler from Say Anything.

Lloyd Dobler

Released just a few years after Kavanaugh’s high school days, Say Anything is the wonderful tale of a just-graduated senior Lloyd Dobler who — to the amazement of many — wins the heart of the brilliant and beautiful Diane Court. 

That the seemingly unattainable Diane would fall for Lloyd doesn’t surprise his many female friends, once they think about it for a second. Sure, he’s smart, athletic, and attractive. But more than that, he’s attentive, upbeat, supportive, respectful, protective. The kind of guy who would spend hours helping a drunk party-goer find his house; who’d guide Diane around some broken glass in the street; then help his sister raise her kid; who’d get in the grill of a guy toying with a female friend’s heart.

You know, the real deal.

When Diane is forced to break up with him, Lloyd decides there’s little point in being a gentleman. His female friends set him quickly straight. 

D.C.: Lloyd why do you have to be like this?

Lloyd: ‘Cause I’m a guy. I have pride.

Corey: You’re not a guy.

Lloyd: I am.

Corey: No. The world is full of guys. Be a man. Don’t be a guy.

According to the dozens of women he’s known since high school and the scores of women since, Kavanaugh was not “a guy.” He was one of the “good ones.” He was a Lloyd Dobler. 

And given a lot of those women ran in the same circles as Ford, watch out. If Lloyd thought kick-boxing was bloody, he never saw women protecting a good male from a female who means him harm.