A Handsaw for Valentine’s Day

By Al Perrotta Published on February 14, 2016

AL PERROTTA — When thinking about Valentine’s Day inspiration my first thought found the familiar words of Paul: “Love is patient, love is kind….”

The words had barely floated across my brain when another thought interrupted: “Paul obviously never did a bathroom remodel with a spouse.”

This weekend, while other couples are consumed with gifts of wine and chocolate, my wife, Rusty, and I are wrestling with grout haze, wood stain, toilet gaskets and two tiny missing pieces from our new faucet fixtures. We are thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to finally being finished with a complete gutting and remodeling of our bathroom; a project that has left us without a shower or safe toilet for over a year, and very few nerves unfrayed.

Ours is a fixer-upper. And so is our house.

Our marriage always has been renovation and restoration. We bought a fixer-upper in L.A. and were married in the backyard 10 days later. Our honeymoon was at Home Depot.

Over the next dozen years, my wife transformed a house so ugly it would scare trick-or-treaters into an enchanting cottage worthy of Home and Gardens. It was a grind. We saw troubled times. At one point, we were threatened with foreclosure. The Holy Spirit shouted into our frightened hearts, “This is my house. I decide when you go.” And He did.

Even when He called us to Texas, He made us wait in California a couple more years. Then one day He said “Now! Sell by the end of summer!” A buying frenzy hit our market. Prices rocketed by the thousands, tens of thousands. “You picked the exact week to sell,” said our realtor. (“Uh, we didn’t pick it.”)

Then the day before the house went on the market I was unexpectedly let go from my job, which I had expected to continue in after moving to Texas. It would be impossible to get a new mortgage, we were told, especially in a new state, certainly not in time to find it, get it and be closed in time to move in. They didn’t know our God. He got us a mortgage and a house in a single day, with closing less than a week after we were to leave California.

Oh. The house happens to be within walking distance of The Stream offices … a job I was offered exactly one year to the day after being laid off.

I mention this not only to encourage you and convince you of God’s mighty hand in the details of your life, but as a reminder to myself, because frankly there are days we’re tempted to give this place back.

Which gets us back to the bathroom, and love. And my Valentine.

Each step has been a struggle. Workers letting us down, walls a pain to put up. Self-leveling cement failing to self-level and having to be chipped away piece by piece. A door failing to align, a toilet failing to fit. Another toilet rocking like a hobby-horse. Construction dust and disarray in every direction. Doubt. Irritation. Raw hands and raw emotions. Sore backs and sour moods. My confusion, since I’m not naturally good at this or knowledgeable or, for that matter, as eager as I should be. Her frustration, since she’s an artist, a craftsman, and after all this time I should be good and knowledgeable. Our shared weariness …

But I’ve got to say this Valentine’s Day, even though I’ve seen my wife dazzle and dominate Beverly Hills red carpets, she’s even more beautiful when splattered in grout. It’s a kick that that she’d prefer a Dremel Saw-Max for Valentine’s Day than a fancy dinner; that she doesn’t want a big, huge teddy bear unless it can also do plumbing; that she prefers oil paint to perfume.

And I feel a greater sense of accomplishment successfully putting up a piece of drywall than I do most anything involved in writing. Even a day like today that’s felt more like like the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre than a romantic movie, it touches me that we’re trying to build something beautiful with this property God has placed in our hands.

Perhaps the headaches and mistakes and messiness and craziness, false starts and faulty parts, are meant to be turned into a life lesson. After all, “By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established.” (Hebrews 3:4).

What I’m learning is:

Love is more HGTV than it is the Hallmark Channel.

More nails and hammers than music and song.

Marriage is more scratchy saw dust than magic fairy dust. But with the right general contractor, that’s more than OK. Without the right one, no amount of magic fairy dust will do.

Thankfully, and fittingly, our Savior is a carpenter. The Bible even tells us He’s the only one for the job. “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.” (Psalm 127:1)

With his crucial, desperately needed assistance, we will complete this house together. It will grow more beautiful and livable with each passing month. The colors and furniture will cease to clash, the dust will be shaken off our feet. The garden will blossom.

In the meantime, to paraphrase the prophet, “As for me and my work-in-progress house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15).

Garden - 90000

 

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