Prior to last week I did not know who Glennon Doyle Melton was. I have never read her blog. But I think I’ve got a fairly good snapshot of the situation: she’s a popular Christian blogger, with a large “following” among women. She translated her blogging success into a best-selling book and a speaking career. She’s funny, genuine, articulate, and honest about some very difficult struggles she’s had in her life.

Now she’s captured the attention of secular media anew with the announcement of her “marriage” to female soccer star Abby Wambach. With all caps she declared under the Instagram wedding photo that LOVE WINS.

A False Gospel

Between this and Jen Hatmaker, there is a very serious problem among some women bloggers/speakers calling themselves Christian. A false gospel emerges out of female bonding, feminine “empowerment,” and shared heartaches, and suddenly the sisterhood has become its own sole authority and yardstick for what’s right and wrong. Christian living resembles less and less the narrow road with the cross on our shoulders and more and more a never-ending social with wine, coffee, and “You go, girl!”chit-chat.

I’m not interested in rehashing the trials Melton has gone through in her life. Her trials do not make her a moral authority. Yet that’s precisely the way she’s been crowned by the large “following” she’s gathered, and by the rest of the media, especially now that she’s made the “brave” move to “embrace freedom” and “choose joy” and “discover love” in new ways by divorcing her husband and “marrying” a woman. Elle magazine called it “The Gospel According to Glennon.” 

This is skewed feminine sensibilities run amok, totally unchecked by right reason and the moral law. Our society is so focused on “empowering” women that it’s considered oppressive to suggest that a woman doesn’t have carte blanche when making her choices. 

When the feminine mind and heart are rightly ordered toward the true good, and willingly obedient to the law of God, she is a force to be reckoned with, and all hell is scared. (Satan’s first serious butt-kicking came via a humble, holy woman’s fiat to God.)

Take away everything but the feelings and the “Girl power” and all hell smiles.

Love Did Not Win

We’re supposed to read Melton’s story and be happy for her. We’re supposed to be impressed at her bravery for deciding to live such a different life and tuning out the criticism. We’re supposed to join in the chorus and shout, “Love Wins!”

Sorry. Love did not win here. Broken vows are not evidence of love. (Yes, I’m aware that her husband broke his vows first.) A shattered family is not evidence of love. And please, don’t try to tell me her children’s lives haven’t been shattered. Don’t tell me how they have even more adults to love them, and how their worlds are now bigger and more inclusive. Don’t tell me how they’ve learned to be accepting and non-judgmental, and how they will be happy because their mother is happy.

No. Just no. The children have learned that the parents’ personal happiness comes above all else. The children have learned that the adults get what they want, and the kids are supposed to be okay with that. No one wants to know if they have negative feelings about it. It’s been presented to them as a great thing. Their foundation has been irrevocably cracked, and they’re told it’s all for the best, because Mom is living the “truth.”

That’s not a victory for love. 

Truth Did Not Win

It has nothing to do with the truth, either. Abandoning marriage for an unnatural sexual relationship that can never be marriage is not a win for love. It is not Scriptural or Christian. It is not God’s will. It’s not authentic anything except confusion and sin. And with her “following,” Melton is happily leading countless other women down the road of confusion and sin with her.

Melton’s husband was unfaithful. He sinned against God and her by his infidelity. He harmed his family tremendously with his selfishness. All of that is true. Melton was then faced with a painful choice. Honor her marriage vows, or not. It really is that simple. Not at all easy or pleasant. Maybe not desirable in the least. But simple. Her husband had broken his vows, but what about her?

Sadly, the father of lies has persuaded Melton that her only hope for happiness, freedom, and truth was to forget her marriage vows, break up her family, divorce her husband, and then start a new life with a lesbian woman. Somehow, she has decided this is what God wants for her, and this is the only way she can live and tell the truth.

She is deceived. She has exchanged the truth for lies. Lies that feed the ego, seem to soothe the wounds of the moment, appear to bring happiness and excitement, and give ample room for whatever she decides is right for her. She is deceived into thinking this will be an example to her children of strength, of what it means to be true to yourself, to be brave and so forth. She is deceived into thinking this new life of hers jibes with Christian morality and following Jesus.

And the women who find camaraderie with her, who see her as an inspiring celebrity, will also be deceived if they do not employ a healthy detachment and sound, sober judgment. This isn’t about a woman wronged by her husband. It’s not about a woman’s feelings or heartbreak. It’s not about the sisterhood.

If women decide that their “empowerment” comes from anything other than carrying their cross and following Christ, in obedience to Him and His Word, then they are deceived. Far from being empowered, they will become weak and imprisoned by feelings that constantly change and desires that are never satiated for long. They will leave a legacy of brokenness and sin for their children; not strength, and certainly not love.

We follow only Christ. That means there is only the cross. Beware any woman, no matter how popular and likable she may be, who has forsaken the Truth in favor of her own truth.